Alice, Should I Warn Our Host About My Child's Interesting Food Aversions?

Alice, Should I Warn Our Host About My Child's Interesting Food Aversions?

Ask Alice
Feb 18, 2016
(Image credit: Shutterstock / Allard Laban)

Dear Alice,

I cannot believe I do not know the answer to this one, but I really need help. Situation: My 3-year-old daughter and I have been invited to the home of a colleague (not quite a close friend) of mine. This will be a girly tea party with finger sandwiches. We are bringing the dessert (that part is so easy). The hostess is not my superior at work (just in case that makes a difference). The issue: my daughter is an extremely healthy eater, but has a very eclectic palette for a 3-year-old.

Example: she does not like all of the "kiddy" food that many other children exist, cheesy or buttered anything is considered "yucky", she prefers water (still or sparkling with a slice of lime or lemon) to juice or soda, and sandwiches hold NO interest for our child. I know how lucky we are and I am aware that this sounds made up.

I am excited by the invitation and do not want my hostess to go out of her way prepping a Kalamata olive salad or lobster and crab rolls with mango chutney, likewise, I do not want my daughter to "No thank you" her way through an entire lunch and have my hostess wonder why my child is not eating anything. I also do not want to have to lie about her behavior and say that she is a picky eater, when really we feel like the luckiest parents in the world, because she eats exactly what we eat...she is happy to down grilled asparagus while one of my brother's kids did not eat anything that was not white in color for over a year.

Would it be at all inappropriate for me to also bring along a salad with some of the items I know my daughter will eat? Please help.

"Mother of 3 going on 35"

Dear Mother,
I have news for your: your daughter is a picky eater How wonderful that she prefers healthier choices—most parents of picky eaters would no doubt choose this scenario over nuggets and mac n cheese—but if she turns her nose up at a sandwich or something buttered, she's picky.

It sounds like the party you've been invited to includes other children and I'm sure many of them also have food preferences to one degree or another. No, don't warn your host to stock up on Perrier and kale chips. Do bring along some food you know your daughter will enjoy the same as another parent may have a jelly sandwich squirreled away in their bag for their own child. Finally, don't apologize to the host if your daughter chooses not to eat the food she presents. I think most people understand that three-year-olds are persnickety.


Have a stumper for Alice? Submit your own question about life at home to

moving--truck moving--dates moving--dolly moving--house moving--cal Created with Sketch. moving--apt